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Birthday “Bum”

3 Dec

The youngster celebrated his birthday last week (or Birthaa Daay as they call it here). He goes to school, hands out sweets and then comes home holding his rear end. The reason. He got the “Birthday Bum” treatment.

For those of you who are not in the know (as I was), it is traditional for your friends to kick you in the backside, one for each year. I don’t know when this “tradition” started.

I then asked my niece who is a second year Medico. She looked at me  and said “Sure thats normal”.

Can anyone shed light on this bizarre tradition. What are the kicks meant to achieve? I’m glad that it wasn’t there when we were in school. Or am I 😉

Mid Week… What the ****

6 Sep

Bow Wow Biriyani…. I Was watching a Kannada news channel and there was this story about mysteriously disappearing pet dogs… the police are interrogating some students who are from the North East… I thought it was the Koreans who ate dogs..

A 12 year old was driving a car that killed a 3 year old… the driver who was next to him and his father who was in the car are the ones who deserve to be punished. Heres what will happen, the Father will say it was the driver who was at the wheel and pay off the witnesses… I had posted on a similar topic some time ago. My friend was lucky to escape

Sunjay Dutt on bail and on a religious tour… in an official car? Man it does pay to be famous and a convicted felon

Everyone who is convicted by a court appeals to a higher court.. so why have lower courts at all? Does anyone accept their verdicts?

So now the JDS government is making the Bangalore/Mysore highway 6 lane.. great !!! There goes the relatively smooth travel to Mysore.. construction starts again… and whopee a whole new lane for someone to overtake me from the wrong side…

Have you heard about this guy M.K. Subba who is an MP but lied about his origin.. he claims he’s Indian but apparently hes a wanted felon in Nepal… well I guess birds of a feather flock together..

Cooking Eggs with your Mobile

31 Aug

Saw this on YouTube… dont know if it is true or a trick… one thing remains though…There is radiation.

Abi-Ash – Tirupathi Travails

26 Apr

So now the Andhra Govt is ordering a probe into Abhi and Ash’s Tirupathi visit where devotees were made to wait while the star couple took its time seeking the Lords blessings.

While all this is okay, how much do you want to bet that this is politically motivated? The Congress Govt in AP… elections in UP…. see any links?

I had a friend who was in Tirupathi when Madam Sonia (the real PM) was there. His experience to put it in his own words was “Horrifying”. So how come no probe then?

Protests and Effigies – A Business Idea

17 Apr

Cauvery Judgement Out – We protest… burn Effigies

Our Cricketers screw up – We protest…burn Effigies

Shilpa gets insulted in “Big Brother” – We protest…burn Effigies

Mandira Bedi wears a tattoo – We protest…burn Effigies

Richard Gere smooches Shilpa Shetty – We protest…burn Effigies

Anything happens – We protest… burn Effigies

Me thinks there is a huge business opportunity to manufacture Effigies for burning. Its an all India market. Today the effigies don’t look anything like the subjects. We can actually make “life like” effigies and even give them sound effects.

The other idea is to create a tourism package around protests. Have a common place for all protests and build stands where people can sit and watch.

My Marks are incorrect sir…

16 Apr

Has been a while since I put something out on Vijaya High.

This happened when we were in 8th grade. Our arithmetic teacher was M. Venkatachaliah (MV). MV was a very senior member of the staff and a good teacher as well. Of course being in the 8th standard we were at the bottom of the pile (meaning juniormost in the school).

We used to sit in the “seminar hall”. A huge room with a large stage. You literally had to “look up” to your teacher 🙂

So we had just had our VERY FIRST maths test and MV was giving out the marks. He had been very generous and ALL of the class had got full marks… except for Yogesha. He had gotten one mark less than the rest.

So he gathers up the courage to go up to the stage. MV is sitting at the desk, his head bent down entering marks. Once he is on stage, Yogi gets braver.. goes right to the desk and says “Saar neevu nange ondu mark kadime kottidheera” (Sir you have given me one mark less).

For a split second MV does nothing, then he pounces off his chair, grabs his test paper and throws it outside the class…. “Yeno Marks beka??? (You want Marks??)” he screams at him… “Go to the high court I say… Go to the Supreme court I say”… as he is saying it, he advances towards Yogi trying to slap him… Yogi is stuck between trying to escape and looking for his paper which is now lying in the corridor…

By now Yogi has lost all fear (Dying men have no fear). He actually starts arguing with MV about how the sum is correct… This infuriates MV even further… “Yeno baddi magane… marksu nimm appana mane asthi antha ankondiya… baro illi…” (loose translation… Do you think your marks are your personal property?)… by now Yogi is tethering at the end of the stage.. he jumps off at the last instant (just as MV’s hand swooshed by where his face was)…

By now the entire class was watching this episode (we were hoping for some blood)… but then the anticlimax of all anticlimaxes… the bell rang…

Amazingly enough both MV and Yogi forgot that incident and life went on normally the very next day…

The Fight (of a different kind) on the Flight

6 Apr

Mohan’s post on flying takes me back to 1999 when I was on a trip to Delhi on an Indian Airlines flight. I was in the middle seat, a colleague in the Aisle and the subject of this writeup.. a complete stranger, was in the Window seat.

So as the passengers settle in, the Air Hostess walks through the plane handing out the customary Orange Juice cartons to all the passengers. These are ones with the straw attached to it. One is supposed to punch a hole using the straw and drink it. Unfortunately for the guy next to me, the “punch hole” was aligned wrong and he was finding it very difficult to punch his straw in.

As time progressed, a “battle” was ensuing between him and the carton. He’d wait for a while and then try to “surprise” the carton by suddenly trying to insert the straw. Being unsuccessful, he’d wait for some more time and then try again. Soon it was getting personal. He was swearing at the carton under his breath. He refused to give the carton back to the Air Hostess as the plane taxied, and waited untile takeoff before resuming his battle.

Soon he had succeeded in punching a small opening, but not large enough to drink out of… As he tried more, the juice started leaking out onto his hands. My colleague and I who were watching quietly told him to ask for another one but by now it was a question of ego. He had taken out his keys and was trying to poke the carton. By this time, there was more stuff outside the carton than the inside. Now the swearwords were targeting the Carton’s mother…

Fortunately by now, the opening was large enough for him to drink out of. He gave both of us a triumphant look and took a large swig at his carton (no he didnt use the straw) and banged the carton on the tray table with a look that said.. “That’ll teach you to mess with me..”

Another Victory for Mankind 🙂