The Hotelier’s Request

20 Feb

Well, my blog “retirement” lasted less than a month…here we go again…

Saar, I have one friend who would like some advise from you on getting a visa. So said “K”, an aquaintance.

“K” was a nice enough guy and had taken voluntary retirement from a public sector bank. Post retirement (at 40), I would often run into him at the local restaurant. The more I tried to avoid him the quicker he found me…anyway thats another story.

“No problems K” I said..pleased that all my foreign travel was appreciated by someone…

Now the friend who needed this advice was the owner of this restaurant. The guy owned a whole chain and was very successful.

So K takes me upstairs to this guy’s office. The room was gaudily decorated and had an idol of every God worth worshipping..carved rosewood furniture, multi colored lamps..the works…

So the initial introduction happens…some snacks are ordered..and the guy starts off..

“Saar, I know you are working with foreign company and are sponsoring peoples to go abroad..”

“Well..I…” I start to babble…its the first time I have heard of “sponsoring” people…

“Anyhow” he continues not waiting for me..”I want to go overseas and want your help”

“Well”, I counter…”Shouldnt be hard for you..after all you are a successful businessman”

“Illa sir…not the point..its very I need your help”..

Now K jumps in… “you see his passport has been impounded…theres a small police case…very minor..”

“Yes..yes..very minor”, the hotelier mumbled..

K continues..” Is it possible for him to get another passport through your company??..he can use another name”

Now I am looking to get out of here..the snacks that have been bought up dont seem tasty anymore….

“See sir”..say K.. “please use your influence…”

“ cant be done. Impossible…” I say

“At least can you apply for visa?” the hopeful K asks.

I am now officially ready to kill K.

“Its a very minor offence..” K says again and the hotelier nods vigourously..

“So what is the case?” I ask..half in jest..

“Well”..says K “..they have accused him of being an accomplice to a attempted murder…please look at him sir, does he look like anyone who can commit a murder?..”
I looked at him..”Of course he does” I say (on the inside)..

“Well, lets see” I said..using the age old Indian expression for “no f***ing way…”

I left his office and K accompanied me downstairs… “Its a very minor offence sir”…he said as I walked away not turning back…

I havent seen K since…maybe hes disappeared..someone committed a minor offence on him perhaps?


21 Responses to “The Hotelier’s Request”

  1. My3 February 20, 2010 at 11:23 am #

    You are backkkkk!!!!!

    Welcome back. Not exactly the kind of food post your blogheads look for, I guess. How terrible that they think money can manipulate everything. Please stay away from such people. Looking forward to many more interesting posts. Some pictures of food would help us, poor pathetic snow-bound Central Pa people as we wait for Spring. Cheers!!!

    • Vijay February 21, 2010 at 5:50 am #

      By the way its getting warm in Bangalore..anyhow these days I have been focussing mostly on Gaadi food..there are a couple of super-duper ones in Jayanagar 2nd block..

  2. some body February 20, 2010 at 2:03 pm #


    you should have recounted the story of what happened to trishanku when vishwamitra tried sending him to swargaloka 😉

    ‘Now K jumps in… “you see his passport has been impounded…theres a small police case…very minor..”’

    i knew it all along! tiger woods is a smart cookie – no minors involved in his offense.

    ‘K continues..” Is it possible for him to get another passport through your company??..he can use another name”’

    is k a commando? hamas might make him a passport!

    ‘“Well”..says K “..they have accused him of being an accomplice to a attempted murder…please look at him sir, does he look like anyone who can commit a murder?..”’

    probably he does not look like anyone who can commit a murder. isn’t that why he was booked as an accomplice?!! 😉

    – s.b.

    p.s.: some nri trishankus might even be glad to share stories of trishanku swarga!! 😉

    p.p.s.: welcome back! the wait was definitely worth it – spoken from the floor because i am rotfling!

    • Vijay February 21, 2010 at 5:51 am #

      SB, the news that you have provided links to, came in the news when I was in Dubai. They have CCTV footage of these guys entering the elevator, coming into Dubai etc…all post-mortem..all of them have disappeared…

  3. Pushpa February 21, 2010 at 5:23 am #

    Yay!!! Vijay, you’re back..See I hadn’t left hope:) Quite scary story though!!

    • Vijay February 21, 2010 at 5:52 am #

      Pushpa..couldn’d stay away..thanks for the welcome…

  4. RamMmm February 21, 2010 at 3:17 pm #

    That was fun, reading for me, obviously not for you sitting there with K and the hotelier. Nimmannu hididharu nodi, eethara kelsakkey. nimma hanebaara, for knowing K 🙂

    • Vijay February 22, 2010 at 12:36 pm #

      Correct..its all forehead writing 😉

  5. Xylene February 22, 2010 at 8:44 am #

    “please look at him sir, does he look like anyone who can commit a murder” gosh! and I am guessing , this would be what his lawyer would be telling in court.

    • Vijay February 22, 2010 at 12:37 pm #

      lol.. just adding “Your Honor” to the beginning.. I still see the guy so either the case is still on or hes been found “innocent”

  6. praneshachark February 23, 2010 at 2:40 pm #

    Welcome back. Sponsoring people abroad !!!! so they want you to be a route for getting onemore passport in another name !!! yen sir nivu Kge hage kansidra. K must have found this as job after taking VR from Bank.
    whatever it may be u r back thats good for us
    nicely narrated and I was looking for some details about mouth watery dishes once read about hotel but disappointed. but spicy post. nodi sar sar sponsoring … consider sir sir sar

    • Vijay February 24, 2010 at 7:10 am #

      Thanks Sir…sorry do disappoint 🙂

  7. Sashi February 23, 2010 at 3:24 pm #

    Yay! you are back. The nerve of those guys to even approach you with something like that.

    • Vijay February 24, 2010 at 7:11 am #

      Sashi..what can I say..I guess they thought it was worth a try…

      Thanks for the Welcome

  8. Prashanth M February 23, 2010 at 5:05 pm #

    good to see you back 🙂

    ps: by any chance were you in vidyarthi bhavan this Sunday morning??

    • Vijay February 24, 2010 at 7:12 am #

      Prashanth, no I wasnt..havent been there in a while..
      Now that you have mentioned it..will go 😉

  9. Suresh February 24, 2010 at 9:07 pm #

    Kickass sir…. welcome back… I wonder after reading this post…. rather should i say awed by your sense of humor…. or should i be wondered how can things and events like these happen to people like you who have this keen eye for observation and kick ass sense of humor…. well anyways , I’ve really had my share of laugh for the day….

    (See I commented… continue writing)

    • Vijay February 28, 2010 at 4:24 am #

      Thanks Suresh…

  10. some body February 26, 2010 at 3:12 am #


    india has definitely changed. this is now neither my parents’ india, nor my india.

    back when i was in india, i doubt i would ever use the words ‘kickass’ and ‘sir’ in the same sentence, let alone right next to each other!! 😉

    come to think of it, i would hesitate to do so even today …

    – s.b.

  11. Suresh February 26, 2010 at 9:45 pm #

    @ S.B and Vijay Sir,

    Now there are somethings like second nature and the slangs and the words that one chooses are pretty much the second nature. And there is definitely a certain level of reverence yet towards elders and those especially who have been your seniors of predecessors at your alma mater… Hence So….

  12. Ram March 13, 2010 at 9:04 am #

    welcome baaacku vijay saaaaar! 🙂

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