Archive | December, 2008

No more Good Times?

30 Dec

“Welcome to Kingfisher” slurs Vijay Mallya during the passenger announcements…. several balah blah blahs later he says something to the effect like “I have asked my staff to treat you as guests in my home”

Well…looks like home is getting a little frugal. The airline is apparently bleeding badly and cost cutting is on the anvil.

Coming back from Delhi last week (Christmas Eve), they ran out of food as they got to me…The guy next to me was not pleased at all “Waaat is this yaaar?” he said to the hostess “How come ki you have not planning properly? This is beri ieppicient” If it was Indian Airlines, he would have been plonked on the head… the Kingfisher one looked at him and smiled.. but behind that smile was a “You A**hole” look…my feelings exactly.

So is the much hyped industry being consumed by itself ?Everyone wanted to get into the Airline business a couple of years ago. Now everyone wants to get out…

As a friend said, “Next thing you know they’ll point you to a faucet and ask you to drink from it..”

Related Post:

And then there was one (ok ok.. I just wanted to recycle some old posts)

Life = Hot Water Shower

30 Dec

“Life is like waiting for hot water under a shower”

We all looked up. Maybe SP had too much to drink? This profound statement was made last week when a bunch of us from college were catching up.

On further checking, it was found that SP was on his fourth beer…but by his lofty standards he was just getting started.

“So you just made that up?” I asked

“No no..” he said “Its true”

He went on to explain…

“You see guru” he said as he gulped his beer…”I have a solar heater at home. You turn on the shower and wait for hot water to come. The water gradually starts getting warmer…but the trick is to figure out when its at its warmest because if you miss it.. the water starts getting colder again..”

“Lifes like that” he continued..ignoring our sniggering…”Maybe right now is the best moment in your life. We should enjoy it”…

I am still trying to grasp it…maybe hes got a point…

Highway “Stars” (with apologies to Deep Purple)

22 Dec

I’ve always had a fascination for idiots on the road. Especially those who put themselves and others at risk.

Coming to the office this morning (and NO I was not driving), I saw this guy on a motorbike “pushing” another with his legs. Now its a novel way to help someone but not on the highway and not in the middle lane. It would be ok to do that in the slow lane I guess, but these morons were actually looking to overtake trucks and such…

Honey I Shrunk Our Dough

18 Dec

Ran into an old friend at the airport during a longish wait for a flight. Obviously the conversation meandered into talking about other people..and then I asked him about a common friend AK…

“Hes in deep s**t these days” he mentioned.

“What happened?”

“Well, hes sleeping on the couch these days…”

“Hmmm what for…?” I was curious

Heres what happened to AK…

A few months ago, he suddenly had chest pains…he was sweating as well, and with a history of heart problems in the family, he was carted of to the emergency room by his wife…

On the way he decides to “bare” everything to his wife (he thinks hes dying)…and tells her about all those “rainy day” moneys that hes blown up in the stock market…the “investment” advises that he has disregarded, his spending money on a golf set etc etc…In the passion of the moment the wife is very forgiving..”Its ok.. get well..we’ll sort it out”

So they make it to the emergency room and find the real problem.. GAS 😀

Its very silent on the way back home…suddenly the missus brakes the car real hard, and then starts off with the expletives..about sister, mother etc…. She asked him to get out of the car and walk home but relented when she found he was wearing only his jammies and no slippers…

Apparently hes been on the couch ever since.

AK’s advise to fellow friends: “Never Confess Anything Until you are sure you are going to die”

Bump, Lump and Slush

15 Dec

BWSSB stands for Bangalore Water Supply and Sewarage Board. They should change their name to Bangalore Bump Lump and Slush Board (BBLSB).

Between them and the BBMP (the Big BuMP)…the city roads are in a constant repair and seepage..

Heres what happens…

  • They dig up the road and just leave it like that..maybe they want people to get used to the lumps and bumps on the road…
  • Next the work starts..just to show their commitment to water…they flood the place…The result..The Addition of Slush to the Lump and Bump…
  • When they finish up, they just leave the place as is, for the BBMP (the Big BuMP) to repair the place.
  • The BBMP then hems and haws and does some half assed work which gets ripped apart at the slightest drizzle and we are back to Lump, Bump and Slush.
  • By then one of the BWSSB workers realizes he has left his spanner underground and they dig up the place all over again…

It goes on and on and on.. like the Energizer Bunny

Still Here

11 Dec

Been busy so no posts. Have had a few mails asking if I was okay. Thanks for the concern guys. Just been distracted for a bit.
To quote The Terminator.. I’LL BE BACK.

Dec 04 2008’s What the ****

4 Dec

The CM of Kerala seems to have multiple personalities.. the first one insults a Martyr, the second one denies it and now hes apologized……oops sorry I forgot, hes a politician…

His statements were so crass that the other politicians didnt support it..even politicians from his own party who normally defend everything the reds do…

There was a Communist Party MP who was at the Taj when the shooting happened… apparently he was having dinner there.. WTF.. isn’t it against party rules? or is it “Do as I say dont do as I do”…
Talking about politicians, notice how quiet they are.. they are probably waiting for the current storm to blow over before starting to make their “great” statements… Of course Lalloo of the Gobbar fame has issued one or two gems…

Now.. I am not too knowledgeable here…if India has proof against Pakistan.. WHY DONT WE GIVE IT TO THEM??? We keep saying we have proof after every terror attack…. am I missing something here?

Pakistani Foreign minister says India is not accusing Pak but elements inside Pak.. duhhhh !!!!

We get hit.. we scream and piss…Pak plays coy… US visits them.. Pak makes lots of mother promises.. US praises Pak and gives them a few billion, US leaves and then Pak thumbs their noses at us.. life back to normal… did anyone expect anything different????