Ammended Traffic Laws

14 Mar

Traffic  laws have been changed keeping in mind the new Indian driver. This overrides Section 303.43 Section B sub section F item 4a of the IPC. To quote government sources, “The new law will ensure smoother traffic and bring down population at the same time”. 

Bangalore has been chosen as the pilot because apparently we’ve been following these rules “unofficially” for quite some time now.

Here they are:

1. Switch on lights (or flash) to drive on the wrong side of the road.

2. Going reverse on a one way street is allowed.

3. You can now make a right turn from the extreme left lane (or a left turn from the extreme right).. as long as you avoid eye contact.

4. Helmet rule has been relaxed…as long as you have a helmet its okay… can be used as a butt guard or an abdomen guard.

5. Advising the vehicle in front of you on how to drive by honking intermittently is now allowed.

6. Musical horns will soon become cumpulsory. Not having one will attract a Rs.500 fine.

7. The fine for wearing a seatbelt is now Rs.300.

8. Its okay to talk on your mobile while driving as long as you dont keep your eyes on the road.

9. Double parking on busy streets is now allowed. But switching your hazard lights on when you do that will attract a fine.

10. Any vehicle allowing pedestrians to cross will be fined. All pedestrian laws have been revoked.

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15 Responses to “Ammended Traffic Laws”

  1. Xylene March 14, 2008 at 2:43 pm #

    11. You can zigzag lanes anytime you want to, using indicator is strictly prohibited.
    12. In case of traffic blocks, the pedestrians are asked to clear out of the footpath, The motorists could use them to avoid traffic.
    13. In case of an accident, the one who is loud is right.
    🙂

  2. My3 March 14, 2008 at 3:39 pm #

    HA! I got myself an international license 2 years ago and “borrowed” my brother;s car to drive in MYSORE. Trust me, after trying to make a turn onto the main road, I decided it was safer for me and the family to take autos!!!!!!!! So back to walking or autos for us. Phew.

  3. some body March 14, 2008 at 10:54 pm #

    how many of these rules must you demonstrate to get that most coveted license?

    – s.b.

  4. praneshachar March 15, 2008 at 3:21 am #

    ROFL hilarious vijay and you are good framer of rules and laws how u manage ur time for all these things in spite busy busines schedule is amazing anyhow we r the beneficiaries and lucuky to read are your valuable posts keep going and we keep enjoying and commenting

  5. neela March 15, 2008 at 3:54 am #

    LOL…..
    Please make ‘rules’ for stray cattle, porcines,jay walkers etal….
    After all they are also ‘authorised road users’.
    Great post !!

  6. Vijay March 15, 2008 at 12:24 pm #

    @xylene: Footpath travel.. how can we forget that ???
    @My3: Mysore still is one of the easiest places to drive 🙂
    @sb: No compromise !!! All rules must be obeyed..
    @pranesh: thanks sir…
    @neela: This will be discussed at the next meeting… 🙂

  7. raydixon March 15, 2008 at 12:26 pm #

    Those rules sound fine to me but what about cyclists? Over here it is now legal to run them down – in fact it’s encouraged and rewarded.

  8. neela March 15, 2008 at 4:09 pm #

    @raydixon: cycling is yet to become ‘cool’ here.

  9. raydixon March 16, 2008 at 5:38 am #

    Good to hear that cycling is not yet “cool” in India. My suggestion is you stamp it out before they take over, like they’re trying to do here. They don’t obey the laws and those outfits in LYCRA !!! are enough to turn your guts inside out. Oh, and those helmets ….

    Mind you, I guess there are already plenty of cyclists in India, only it’s not considered “cool” to ride one. Maybe there should be a government program to get them all into Tata Nanos? Only $2,500 and they seat five !!!! Problem solved. Ban the bicycle.

  10. Vijay March 16, 2008 at 12:46 pm #

    @Ray: We have enough two wheelers (read Motorcycles, Mopeds, and Scooters) who make up for the cyclists…

  11. Veena March 17, 2008 at 3:59 am #

    what about over rushing in autos? specially those who takes school children?

    Vijay, looks like this is an overview of all other traffic posts 🙂 well framed!

  12. shreeram March 17, 2008 at 7:28 am #

    RULE NO:14: Your vehicle should emit lot of smoke and make lot of noise atleast on par with auto rickshaws else your license will be cancelled.. by this there are 2 advantages

    1)by inhaling smoke more people will die thus acheiving decline in population
    2)due to noise and smoke more people will stay at home during leisure time instead of going outside thus decongesting the road and ensuring smoother traffic

  13. Vijay March 18, 2008 at 4:11 am #

    @Shreeram: Oh ya.. forgot the smoke and noise pollution bits…

  14. raydixon March 18, 2008 at 11:45 am #

    Aussie Kiss same as French Kiss. Except Down Under

    Huh? A French kiss is a tongue kiss in the mouth. Are you suggesting an Aussie kiss is a tongue kiss too … but below the belt? It’s a new one on me. Most Aussie blokes prefer to be the recipients of that activity not the givers. Especially while they’re drinking a beer. We’re still in the dark ages over here!

    (Sorry to be off topic Vijay but I couldn’t help but notice it)

  15. Harsha March 23, 2008 at 6:39 am #

    Hehe.. Lols.. Nice Post!

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